Lou Mulford

A friend advised me recently, “Don’t have expectations.  Expectations lead to disappointment. Instead focus on the challenge of the day and remain in the moment.” Logically this makes perfect sense.  However, like a frustrated child pulling on my arm in a crowd of chatty adults I am soon drug down to my habitual thinking, “Maybe the corner has been turned! Life will begin to be normal again from here on out!” and kaboom it’s back to the Parcheesi board square one.  At least that’s what it feels like at times.

I am longing for the light in a tunnel of circumstance so long and difficult there are no words to accurately describe the battle.  It is a kind of warfare that I may share in more detail someday if given permission for my public platform.  The story is ongoing and as a protagonist in this narrative not of my choice, I patiently and proactively await the resolution.

I do my best to avoid expectations but that does not disallow hope.  I have intense hope, and belief that this chasm enveloping me is part of a temporary journey I must walk.  I have faith in God and His almighty power and control in my life to work every situation for good.  

I am thankful for today that I finally have the wherewithal to sit down and write.  One can only do what one is capable of and in this moment, I’m living in a kind of survival mode mentality.  It’s okay…. it’s okay not to be okay.  How exhausting it would be to live a life of Instagram perfection month after month, year after year.  How would we know how good most of us have it if we didn’t have some trouble at times for comparison?  Granted there are levels of adversity.  Some trials I’d definitely pass on, including this one, but unfortunately, we don’t usually have a choice.  I have to accept the darkness when it invades my light and work with the palette the best I know how.  Every artist knows that contrast is key to provide depth and impact in their painting.  There are always lessons to be learned. 

 Proverbs 19:21 tells us “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”  One of His purposes is to grow and strengthen us.  We are tested and refined and molded into the people He created us to be by the trials we face and conquer with His help at every turn.

I have had His faithful assistance.  That help has come through others extending themselves with love and praying for my family and me even when we are too tired or unable to find the words to pray.  I feel those prayers, and I feel His presence.  With each passing day my load is a little lighter, my attitude a little clearer and focused on that light that shines so brightly in the distance. 

Years ago, my husband and I took a family trip to the Grand Canyon.  We walked down the 10-mile trail for a camping trip at the Havasupai campground.  The terrain was hot, dry, and rugged.   We traversed the switchback with determination to reach our destination.  No question it was beautiful when we arrived and the waterfalls were spectacular, but after three nights on the ground with no sleep, no bathing other than a river swim, and the toilet in the God given foliage (I can’t even think about that putrid hole of an out-house they offered 25 years ago without losing my lunch. We chose the trees off the beaten path over death by latrine) I was on that final day like a desperate rental horse on a mission to get home to the barley and hay.

I painstakingly put one foot in front of the other for the 6 maybe 7- hour hike up to the rim.  I was driven by the hope of a bed and a hot bath.  I lost both my toenails on that trip. They turned purple black as midnight and eventually fell off. 

I remember how good I felt when we reached the air-conditioned car and drove to our hotel in Vegas.  We were so nasty they upgraded our room to a two-bedroom suite so we wouldn’t disgust the other guests as we waited for our room which wasn’t ready when we arrived.  There are always surprises and gifts amid the turmoil.  It just takes patience and perseverance if you have the heart to hang on.

So, I remind myself of that perilous march as we crawl out of our current valley.  There are switch backs that weave right and left, good days and bad.  Two steps forward with three steps back, but progress is our constant companion.  There are daily blessings even when I feel cursed and the light beckons with a brilliance illuminating my hope of the future sure to come. 

Easter is next week and for my faith it is the height of our hope and the realization of every promise God made to mankind.  If Christ could walk victoriously through the torture of His destiny and His disciples were able to follow suit, then I can muster the courage to bravely face what I must as well.

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what we see is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

2 Corinthians 4:18 NIV

“For I know the plans I have for you”, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  

Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Jesus Has Risen

16 When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go to anoint Jesus’ body. ² Very early on the first day of the week, just after sunrise, they were on their way to the tomb ³ and they asked each other, “Who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?”

⁴ But when they looked up, they saw that the stone, which was very large, had been rolled away. ⁵ As they entered the tomb, they saw a young man dressed in a white robe sitting on the right side, and they were alarmed.

⁶ “Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. ⁷ But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.’”

Mark 16:1-7  NIV